How Aiming For Perfect Misses the Mark



It starts out fine and well, you just want to do a good job! Yet, weeks before the event/meeting/launch, you’re working well into the evening and waking before the birds to get your project done.

Scoot ahead to the night before the “thing” and is the project even “perfect” to you? If you’re this kind of person, then no matter what you’ve created, in your mind, it still could have been better if you “had enough time.”

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You don’t have to be so hard on yourself.

Perfectionism is a kind of sneaking thing that elusively always keeps you below where you want to be.

Imagine if the same situation above had been given… eeep… a novel concept to perfectionists… breathing room! Yes, room to just let the thing sit there and breathe, hypothetically of course (while you deep breathe… now there’s an idea!). Notice how this is the complete opposite problem that most people have… they procrastinate. It’s human!

Perfectionists? They’re a special kind of human. They need to have someone say stop, slow down, rest a while, take a nap. To the rest of the world, taking a nap, a break or eating something on your “forbidden” list is a welcome thing for a perfectionist.

Perfectionists need to break the pattern of perfect and indulge, rest, and let things “breathe.”

Here’s the funny thing about this. As soon as you take a break, and let the thing rest, without spending nearly as much time as you were before, somehow, everything comes together perfectly. You’ll get a call from someone who has the piece to the x,y,z thing and can help you, or you’ll have a burst of creative energy and will finish everything at once, or, the “thing” is rescheduled anyway and you didn’t need to stress yourself out on it.

Next time you’re trying to make something “perfect,” why not try doing the opposite… and see if it actually turns out perfectly in the end.

And, if you need support in your life, consider counseling to see if our team of therapists for women with anxiety, depression, perfectionism and more, is a good place for you to feel safe expressing yourself.

We’re here for you any time you’re ready.

Click here to schedule a 15-minute consultation to see if we might be a good fit. Thank you for reading. Help is a phone call away.

Root Counseling, Jen Kilgo, counselors in denver, counseling for women, therapist in denver

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