No one wants to admit being a control freak…. But a lot of us gals are! Let’s be honest. Are you the type that rearranges the dishwasher after your partner “helps” you load it? Do you plan weekly meals, hang your clothes up by color, or have a schedule that you just have to stick to (or suffer a “freak out”)?
It’s okay lady! You’re passionate and it’s not your first rodeo (or second… or third…) And you’ve mastered the way to “do things right.” It makes sense!! Yet, if you’re reading this, you also know that sometimes, you have to let others do things their way too, and not let the “off-routine” mess up your whole day (or life).
How to Find Balance When You Have No Control
Close your eyes. Count to ten. Refocus your energy on something else. These tasks seem actually impossible when you are having to try to do them. Vacations sometimes bring this out strongly. For example, when you have to listen to a genre of music that you can’t stand… (for hours) and can’t say anything because you’ll hurt someone’s feelings. Or, when you wanted to wake up early to get something done, but you were a little too loud and now everyone’s up talking to you, ruining your zen moment. Maybe you wanted to have a healthy day, but everyone starts drinking early, getting too tired for the evening plans you were looking forward to.
Metaphysical and Practical Solutions to Stay Calm
Life is like this. Chaotic. How can us anxious-prone women find calm within the storm, without making it worse, and still enjoy the moment? There are metaphysical solutions and practical ones. Using both can help reduce the anxiety of the situation, and maintain your relationships, while avoiding ruining the moment or the day.
Counting, using an anxiety ring (I am not slanging rings, but these are just cool and help some people), utilizing a stress ball or some other method of zen-ing out can help you in anxiety triggering times. As can activities that give you time away from the stressful situation to think. Like what? Headphones! A coloring book. A puzzle or word game. Taking a run, or hiding off to have a stretch session. Taking a shower even. Organizing something… anything… Doing your makeup (if you enjoy that!). Fixing food for everyone. Or, making a snack for you. Drinking water or making a lovely non-alcoholic (and non-caffeinated) beverage for yourself.
All of these can help you in the immediate time to reduce anxiety and avoid clashing with people or your surroundings. It’s so hard, but being part of the team instead of a lone wolf is a great skill to work on. As independent women, we can put too much emphasis on perfectionism. Sometimes, you have to just roll with the day… There’s something else that can help too:
Anxiety Counseling Denver | Counseling for Anxiety
You know what though? One of the most important things when it comes to anxiety is to realize that you can cause yourself more anxiety by trying to heal on your own. Pushing down the anxious thoughts can oftentimes cause them to bubble right back up, in the form of damaging anger (the unhealthy type that you have to apologize for or “fix things” afterward). Finding an anxiety counselor in Denver can be as simple as asking a friend who they recommend, or searching online and finding an anxiety therapist you vibe with.
At Root Counseling, Jen Kilgo, LPC works specifically with women experiencing anxiety.
And, guess what? You actually can heal. Reaching out is the first step. Click for a complimentary call with Root Counseling to see if anxiety therapy could help you find more peace and balance in your life.